I decided to sluff work and school the other day.  Lefts face it, the day was way to nice to sit in an office and work.  I decided to take the kids out of school and hit the slopes.

While skiing we found some interesting treasures in the trees.

Let me know if you say your underwear in the trees.

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I’ve been playing around with GarageBand 09.  I’ve been working with some new beats in GarageBand, I’m trying to find the right tones and tempo for my new music video (click here to see the summers biggest hit)

I thought it would be cool to do a tutorial on creating your own free ring tones

When your done don’t forget to sync your phone to iTunes.

hauler-back if you love your garage band and share your thoughts and comments in the area below.

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Guess who got the last laugh?

Last night I was watching Saturday Night Live and Ms. Swift was the host and she took some pretty funny pokes at Joe Jonas, Kenya West  during her monologue and she surprised your teenage daughter with her mention at about 1:32.

So instead of honoring the guy who invented the fur lined jockstrap called “The Duke” I thought very appropriate to show the world what is being called “the monologue song.”  Enjoy

Yes, I’m fully aware that I spelled Kenya’s name wrong, I did that on purpose.  The real spelling is D-U-M-B-A-S-S  (do the chickens have large talons?)

If I was that talented the world would be even more screwed up.

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Sorry for last week, i know you missed me. I’ve been busy getting ready for the big move.

I’ve discovered that if my speaking thing didn’t work and my real estate thing didn’t work and my airsoft general thing didn’t work and my video directing thing didn’t work, then I could always become a Black Eye Pea.

Just for the record, my team did not lose.

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From my friend Jeff Walker….

The Singlespeed World Championships were held in Durango CO.  It’s call the single speed because everyone’s bike has ONE gear instead of the typical 27 gears found on most mountain bikes.  The race is 22 miles long, with 5,000 vertical feet of climbing. And it was a tough course… narrow, twisty single track – maybe 18-30 inches wide… with big rocks and boulders and cliffs and roots and drop-offs and such

His son’s seat breaks in the first mile leaving just the naked post.  Instead of quitting he decides to keep going and finished the full 22-mile race. It took him right around 4 hours 30 mins.

Can you imagine standing up and pedaling as hard as you can for 4.5 hours? That’s a long time to be standing on your pedals… but he wasn’t gonna quit.  Here is the video of him approaching the finish line on his no seat naked post bike.

I consider myself pretty tough but this might be the toughest kid on the planet.

I guess I have no excuses and can’t bitch at my 10 miles tomorrow.  At lease my seat will be on, well, I hope it will be on.  Either way you get to decided; quit or continue, you’ll make the right choice.

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It’s been a long, long weird and bizarre week.  It’s been one of those weeks were it was better for me to shut my mouth then to say to some idiot, “here you non tolerant jackass, have yourself a can of shut the hell up.”  So I laid low, wrestled with my dog, posed for some photo’s at the old folks home and who knows why but I was asked to do a career training at the local elementary school which I did.  Please forward all therapy bills to the address on my contact us page

After a week like this it’s important to remember the two things in life that matter
1- breasts
2- humor

So on this Funny Friday I give you this.  One man’s attempt at kindness flipped around 180 degree’s.  Trust me you’ll relate.

Comments are the best so please share one of yours with me in the section below

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Here is a video that Jim one of my readers sent me. Its harmless fun with a couple of kids.

Now File This Under “You May Want To Lighten Up…….Just A Bit”

Below are some comments from a YouTube viewer

“Well, I can see these kids are trying to get their parent to pay attention to them. Now that they do get attention through this kind of action, who knows what will happen to them as grown-ups. Stop shoving this crap down the throats of our children! They have a right to discover and like their own music!   Signed Zerosister

First Off -
…..  You can’t get touch with a name like Zerosister.  That’s like an MMA fighter stepping into the cage with a name like Estragen Gonzalez.  Both fighters might get hurt but one will definitely have sore breasts.

Second Off -
……….”down the throats of our children? Is “ZEROSister” a divorcee who is pissed off at her ex-husband’s new girl friend who can be heard on the audio saying “honey get the Miley Cirus stripper pole?”  or

Lastly -
……Is it that we as a society are wound up so tight about everything from H1N1 to the economy, healthcare reform and our bailout money.  Are we so high strung that we have forgotten what it’s like to be a kid?

You and I both can learn a lot from kids.  The most important is they (kids) could care less what everyone thinks about them and they know that slapping your ass in front of people, no matter what your age or size is still funny.

Share your comments, loves, hates or slap it videos in the comments below.  Mom, I’ve already seen yours and yours to Dianne.   Kirk I see yours every year at Lake Powell.  The BigRock I have no desire to see yours.

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The Airsoft Militia decided that we needed to film an action packed Airsoft War.  We all drew straws and I lost.  Little did I know the bush and kill cam created the best Airsoft War video on the internet.  Video assist made possible by Flip Mino HD and my trusty Xshot.

I got shot more as a camera man then I did as a player.

Look out Spielberg, I’m buying DreamWorks and taking over your job.

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Considering my latest beef with Bill Gates (click Here) and his God complex, I thought it appropriate to discuss my newest purchase.  Yesterday I went out and ordered the newest, top of the line PC with a 70 inch monitor.

JUST KIDDING

My only issue with PC’s is that I didn’t follow the advice of my brother in law and make the switch to my Mac sooner.

If you have the stones, tell the world if your a Mac or PC person in the comments below.

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Last Friday Bill Gates turned the science community on its head when said he wanted to stop hurricanes.

To prove to the world he was serious he and a dozen other scientists submitted patent applications for technologies that reduce the danger of approaching hurricanes by cooling ocean temperatures.

SIDEBAR………… I don’t know the man personally.  He’s called, I’ve ignored him and we’ve played this game for years.  I am no longer a supporter or users of Windows due to what my people have found to be “faulty coding.”  When 96 percent (and falling) of the world uses his software that doesn’t give him permission to build inferior software with holes in it; holes that allow virus developers to attack my machine. These developers have become alias and friends who work for Gates because he secretly owns the virus and adware protection companies.  This allows Gates to double dip on all sales.  His net worth has been as high as 54 billion but that doesn’t account for his before mentioned ghostly partnerships in other “software ventures.”   It those were noted he would worth more than god.

AND WERE BACK…………Patent clerks have been quoted as saying that Gate’s stuff is “Really Cool and will help a lot of people who live along the water like those in Detroit.”   Really, hurricanes in Detroit; are they serious?  “That’s probably why you’re still a clerk.”

Is this an instance of having to much money?  Has his once Einstein-esk brains turned into Mississippi mud?  Should Warren Buffet be worried about his financial contributions and demand his money back.

Are all those children in Africa going to be victims of Katrina type hurricanes?  Its possible you know; hurricanes have to go somewhere and since a lot of them form off the western coast of Africa this “new technology” could produce a 180 effect sending all hurricanes back to Africa.  TRAGIC.

So Mr. Gate let me remind you of two scientists who wanted to “seed” clouds to remove fog and produce snow.  They would fly up into the fog, dump their “seed” stuff and hope it would snow.  They did this for a few days with no success.

On one occasion they went up to do their “seeding” on what was the nastiest and foggiest day on record but on this day their eyes couldn’t see out of the fog in time and their plane hit a mountain.  Needless to say – no one is “cloud seeding” in the Rocky Mountains any more.

William, Do You Think Your God?

Having a God complex didn’t work for Alec and it probably won’t work for you.  My advice is to stick with things you can do like stopping speeding trains with your bare hands, or leaping over tall building in a single bound.  Catching bullets with your teeth.

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