Yesterday I went for a WOG across the Golden Gate Bridge.  The bridge is 72 years old and millions of people from around the world come to San Francisco every year to take in this awesome man / woman made wonder.  If you haven’t made it to the Golden Gate, I suggest you go and take your own WOG, its worth it.

Here is my WOG across the Golden Gate Bridge.  No one died during the filming but as you’ll see in the video a helicopter comes pretty close.

If you’ve been across the Golden Gate, share your story in the comments below.

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I guess we’ll never know how Michael Jackson has touched the world.  What we do know is that Michael Jackson has taught every generation how to touch themselves.

I saw this little man while waiting for the boat to come back from Alcatraz yesterday.  The kid knew how to work it.  I only caught the tail end of the show. He dances so fast I had to slow the frames down just to keep up.

Ladies and Gentleman, I give you “spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch” Michael Jackson style.

Please share your thoughts and comments below.

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Yesterday I met two extremely brilliant young scientist who claim they have a car that travels back and forth to outer space for “Galactic Experiments.”

This new found information caused me to pause and visualize all the opportunities with a car like this.  In my head I quickly ran through my Rolodex identifying possible investors and venture capitalists.  A car that goes back and forth to the furthest parts of the galaxy is worth K-Zillions.  On the street I took out a piece of paper and started to draw up an offer to buy “Dub Robot when “Doc Brown” as I call him said, “Don’t Even, the dub is not for sale.”  I  thought every man has his price but when it comes to Dub Robot I was wrong.

My efforts to save the American Auto Industry had failed.  Oh well, maybe they’ll sell me the motorcycle prototype.

If you would like to be notified when the Motorcycle Prototype is done, please let me know in the comments.

Please share your thoughts and comments below.

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If you’ve struggled to meet the opposite sex, I have the perfect cure.  If you want to learn how to pick up girls, forget everything you’ve learned from the “Pickup Artist”, just sit your dad out in public, stick a camera in his face and learn.

Listen as my father reveals why woman are so attracted to me.

Take a minute and tell me what makes you so popular with the opposite sex.

Please share your thoughts and comments below.

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There are a lot of things that suck in life but right now being on a diet while on vacation; that really blows.  This week I’m in San Francisco with my family having a good time and I left my scale at home.  So this week will be an “On The Plan” week without my scale, I hope it will be an “On The Plan” week.

Here are the weight loss totals by day

July 9 – 275.6
July 10 – 270.6
July 11 – 267.6
July 12 – 265.4
July 13 – 264.4
July 14 – 263.2
July 15 – 261.8
July 16 – 260.6
July 17 – 260.0
July 18 – 258.2
July 19 – 257.6
July 20 – 257.8
July 21 – 257.2
July 22 – 256.0
July 23 – 255.4
July 24 – 254.8
July 25 – 254.4

Please share your thoughts and comments below.

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On December 31 2008 I sat in my basement with some family and friends, goofing off, playing videos games and waiting for ABC to air, “ weekend at Bernie’s” – “I mean Dick Clarks Rockin Eve.”  Dick, Retire!  Let us remember you as you were, not as you are.

I’m sure you’ve seen the movie Rockstar with Mark Wahlberg or heard about a young singer in Asia named Arnel Pineda who belted out Journey tunes and was later discovered by Journey band member Neal Schon through a YouTube video.

What you may not know is that on this night, after the ice water was flowing freely, I recorded a video that forever changed the music industry.

When the video went public on January 1 2009 it was immediately notice by industry giants Jine Records and Phat Beats.  Jine immediately made a play to sign the artist but because of currency conversion rates, their offer came in less than Phat’s.  At 11:52 PM on January 1 2009 Phat Beats Incorporated had signed this amazing singer.  At the press conference a reporter from knucklebone asked what he thought about his signing and the deal in general.

He replied
“Lou Graham Can’t Hold My Jock!”

Enjoy the audition video and for best result watch in HQ on the bottom right.

The album is due out in January 2012.  Thats if the Myan calander is wrong and were all still here.

Please share your thought in the comments section below.

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It’s been a long week and I want to thank everyone for their notes, cards, emails and comments of encouragement. You didn’t have to take time out of your day to wish me luck and say nice things but you did and I thank you.

It’s hard to believe but even I get hate mail. The haters also came out to share their two cents about my Secret New Diet. Do yourself a favor, if you’re going to send hate mail, sign your name. I might give you some respect and I doubt I’ll send one of my goons looking for you. It’s too expensive and let me be honest, if I unleashed JC-MixALot, there is a high probability you’ll be making a special guest appearance on the next episode of Six Feet Under.

Here are three of the anonymous hate notes I’ve received over the last week.
“I’ll stick a fork in you cuz you’ll be done by Wed.” – Anonymous
“Tan your ass” – Anonymous (for the record, my rear has not seen a camera – yet : )
“Even IF you get skinny, I’LL STILL HATE YOU! – Anonymous

Winner, Winner Chicken Dinner!! That’s all I can think about because that’s all I seem to eat. I remind myself “its just fuel.”

Here are the weight loss totals by day

July 9 – 275.6
July 10 – 270.6
July 11 – 267.6
July 12 – 265.4
July 13 – 264.4
July 14 – 263.2
July 15 – 261.8
July 16 – 260.6
July 17 – 260.0
July 18 – 258.2
July 19 – 257.6

Please share your thoughts and comments below.

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If you’re looking to blow off some steam, relieve some stress or you feel like Michael Douglas in the movie falling down, take an Airsoft BB to the head. It will knock the stress right out of you.

My manager and my agent have bought me a full-face shield.  They like to remind me that the face is how they get paid.  I told them “we live in a world that has wall and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns.  Who’s going to do it?  You?  I have a greater responsibility than you can possible fathom.  You weep for my forehead and you curse my militia.  You have that luxury, you have that luxury of not knowing what I know that my forehead probably saved lives and my existence while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties you want me on that wall; you need me on that wall. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a men who rises and sleep under the blanket of Freedom I provide and then question the manner in which I provide it.  I would prefer you just say thank you and went on your way.  Other wise I suggest you pick up a weapon and stand a post, either way I don’t give a damn about your face shield.”

Any and all airsoft comments should be shared below and share your thoughts and comments on my speech.

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The “secret” diet calls for 1 once of water for every pound I weigh not to exceed 2 gallons a day.  If you remember from my starting weight (if you forgot click here) I would need to put down 275 ounces of water.

For the last week I have averaged about 1 gallon of water a day.  Yes, that is a lot of water and yes, I pee like a mad man but the reason you need that much water is it flushes out toxins.  To make it more simple think of this; a lot of water puts the body into what I call the “get rid of” state.

I will be the first to yell it out “it’s a pain in the butt to drink that much water.”  If your like me you need a toilet or a bush close by at all times.  I will also confess, I believe the water has been a big player in the diet.    I’ll show you some more loss numbers tomorrow.

Is water a good thing for the diet or a killer of your kidney’s?  Share your thought in the comments below.

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In December of this year I will turn 43 years old and I’M A COW!!   No seriously, I’m as big as a farm.

I’m 5’ 9” and I weigh 275 pounds, now that is a big boy.  How does one balloon to 275 pounds? Let’s look at some “potential” reasons.
1.    I’m lazy and undisciplined
2.    I have bad genes in my family
3.    I spent the last three years on a plane
4.    I’m an anorexic survivor
5.    I’m an emotional eater
6.    I’m eat when I’m bored
7.    I love carbs

Lets talk about #1 for just a second.  I have a very shallow friend name Eddie who lives in Florida and I talk with him almost every day.  About a year ago we were having dinner at a nice restaurant in Los Angeles CA when out of the blue he says, “ Fat people are lazy and undisciplined and I don’t like being friends with them.”  To me this was a very odd comment since I am as big as big as a house and he to this day loves me like I weigh 150 pounds.  It’s not that I’m lazy and undisciplined, looking like Jay Cutler has never been a focus.

Here is the truth of it all; I have “different” genes in my family.  Grandma P – my grandmother was 4’11” and weighed close to 400 pounds.  I did spend the last three years on airplanes and in hotels, I am a bored and emotional eater and I love carbs especially bread.

Last week I asked my great friend Larry Scott the bodybuilder for some help, he and his business partner put me on a “Special Diet.”  They prepared the meal plans; all I have to do is follow them.

Since I am “Almost A Celebrity” I do have a contract with Under Armour and I did take some before shots of me in nothing but my delicates but I won’t post them yet because they’re hot, super hot.  I will share them once I get down to my target weight.

Here are the weight loss totals by day

July 9 –   275.6
July 10 – 270.6
July 11 – 267.6
July 12 – 265.4
July 13 – 264.4

Check back often, I will be posting the daily LOSS TOTALS every Monday until I get to my target weight.  I’ll also be sharing my thoughts on this journey randomly, so stay tuned.

Against my advisers and legal team, I’m talking my battle with the bulge public because 1- everyone needs to held accountable; even me.  2- You might have that same battle and my struggles might help you with yours. If so please share your thoughts and comments below.

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Now go out there and start talking about me